Diablo 3 came out last week and is still going through judgement, which if I'm honest may be an indication that its inevitable end is 'bad'. I managed to clock up 70 hours in game as a Barbarian pretty quickly and yes, there are games I loved that I didn't put 70 hours into in the course of a week or two, but Diablo 3 just seems to be missing something which is what I'm going to examine now.
This is how I see the world.
- Monk - Ok sure, quite interesting I suppose. Although I questioned what a warrior famous for using their fists as weapons and wearing only simple robes was going to do in a game based on 'phat loot'.
- Wizard - Its just a ranged magic user, right? An obvious class and part of the 'holy three' that is available in every fantasy based game along with the warrior and the rogue.
- Witch Doctor - A fresh take on the summoner class, will probably be the 'wacky' choice.
- Barbarian - Yeah, whatever.
- Demon Hunter - Eurgh. I hate rogues and the demon hunter has to be the gimpiest incarnation of a rogue yet. Dual cross bows wielded by a 6 stone goth in a cravat? Give me strength.
- Paladin - My class. I play it in everything. I enjoy the mix of heavy armour and magic and Diablo 3s take on... sorry? What do you mean there isn't a Paladin? Are you kidding me?
Words couldn't describe my rage when I learnt that the Paladin wasn't a playable class. In fact here is a practical demonstration of words being unable to describe my rage:
" "
Further in development we learnt that the most famous and iconic warrior and staple fantasy character had been relegated to a 'Templar' and an annoying one to boot. My paladin whining aside this also left a clear hole in the class selection. The only classic 'Warrior' is now the barbarian so all the items that generate with strength and intelligence are totally useless. And shields? Who is meant to use them now? Barbarians are not supposed to wield shields!
A barbarian in heavy armour
Now I can't stand ranged combat and I love plate armour so my only choice was now the Barbarian who after 57 levels is frankly boring. I see my friends casting laser beams or summoning spiders, I see them teleporting around the battlefield with their ninja skills and placing turrets with rocket launchers. Then we have me using my amazing smash ability with rune of smash. Sometimes I even change smash for crash and if I want to go really crazy I use smash with rune of crash. Or at least I used too. Now I'm in hell mode I actually use weapon throw as I run backwards towards the town guards.
So, I've pointed out the absolute dearth of the melee classes what else don't I like? The server issues were and still are pretty bad. Not being able to log in to play single player is a little bit like not being able to ride your bike until the swimming pool is full, but I suppose everything is heading towards online only so I can't really judge.
The gear is boring. I don't like the tier system and the fact that every class will end up looking the exact same. I remember a pre release screenshot of witch doctor armour decrying 'variety is key' which a huge selection of fancy looking armour. Little did I know it was just a gear progression and that the implied choice of gear was in fact nonexistent.
I don't like Leah, I don't like mortal Tyrael, I don't like most of the 'nephalem'. The only character I do like is Covetous Shen which is odd considering he was designed specifically to be annoying. Now I'm almost done you must be asking, ''Is there anything this guy does like?''
The champion skullcrusher of immolation, hmm
I do like the gameplay and the graphics. The combat does feel mostly satisfying and the monsters have some quite interesting twists, such as the poo demon, who sucks up smaller demons through his anus before vomiting them onto castle walls (Note: My interpretation not official Blizzard lore).
I like the auction house but I'm super sceptical of the real money one, and if/when it ever arrives I'll probably like the PvP. I do forsee the balance and gameplay issues with that making WoW rage look like a stroll through sunshine and dolphins land.
The item choice is so lacklustre though I really don't see people forking out $250 to try and beat an equally lacklustre end game which by most accounts appears to be getting repeatedly killed by a leaper with molten, vortex, plagued, mortar.
